Bronson Xerri
I know Jonathan Sua could definitely beat the shit out of me, but that doesn’t change the fact that he has been about as effective as a shopping bag full of old batteries for the Dogs over the last few weeks. I’m not talking about a magical, sentient bag of old batteries with legs either; like I mean Cameron Ciraldo might as well have just walked up to the halfway line and dropped a literal plastic shopping bag full of spent AAs a metre in from touch, and that may have actually had a more positive effect on their stats over the last few games than Jonno has. Nevertheless, I’ve talked shit now so you should probably get on him for FTS and a hat trick, because he’s facing my team and that’s how the simulation works, but if I’m correct, then Bronson should be the winner of Melbourne’s weekly try raffle that they’ve been giving out to left side backs for the last 8 straight. Just so we’re clear, this would have in all certainty gone to Jacob Kiraz had he not been moved to Fullback this week.
Will Warbrick
The Doggies have been repeatedly disrespected by right wingers for the past four straight games. Seven. Seven tries in four games. Will Warbrick doesn’t usually require that much of an invitation, but it’s nice to be polite.
Sitili Tupouniua
The Storm have been fuckin ransacked by Right side edge runners this season, and I am almost certain Sitili will be starting in that spot this week. I know this because a little SportsBirdy is offering me bonus odds for Jake Preston, who should have a much harder time with things over on the left where Melbourne have given up just one try on the season. Absolutely doable for Presto btw, but why not go with the square peg through the square hole? You think you’re better than me ya gronk? Answer me. Right side second rowers have also scored the First or Last try against the Storm 3 times in the last seven games, so that’s worth a shout too.
Moses Leo
While the Dogs have been hit up the right side for the last four straight, Left side wingers have scored against the Dogs in just as many games, and they’ve done it first or last on four occasions so far.
KRS/Hughes
Spine players have spent the last 6 weeks getting fuckin busy all over the Bulldogs, most of all has been opposition halves. Five straight games in a row they have been scored on by 5/8s. Worth a punt on the new kid with that disgusting stat in mind.
Fa’alogo/Howarth
Ignoring the fact that the Bulldogs have outside backs full of ringers this week, either one of these two cunts has scored every single game so far regardless of who they have faced.
