Xavier Savage
“But Murray Taulagi is back mate, won’t be anymore right wingers getting through”. I hear you smugly muttering to yourself while looking at this. Which Murray Taulagi mate? The one that Will Warbrick bitchslapped for four tries back in round 4? That Murray Taulagi? Sit all the fuckin way down cunt.
Murray Taulagi
Just because he can let in a try or two, doesn’t mean big Muz can’t score the absolute shit out of em too. The Raiders track record has been fuckin woeful against left wingers so far, with 10 tries coming through them in the last 8 games. In three of those they gave up doubles to left wingers as well, and Murray has got some catching up to do so, on your bike mate. Come on, chop chop.
Kaeo Weekes
Now this is an interesting fuckin stat, Puntlings. Canberra’s Fullback has scored in every second game this season with unbelievable consistency. The Cowboys aren’t particularly weak to opposition fullbacks, but he didn’t score in their last game and it looks like this cunt has a schedule to keep, so let’s not stand in his way yeah?
Jaxon Purdue
Hey speaking of weird stats pertaining to cunts scoring every second game, the Raiders have been scored on every other week by left centres since round 2, and wouldn’t you know it, a left centre didn’t score on them in their last game. You have to think the Cows will be force feeding Murray Taulagi against the Raiders’ weak side, and Jaxon’s haircut is evidence enough of what a thieving little cunt he probably is, so it wouldn’t surprise me at all if he pinched one for himself.
Savelio Tamale/Seb Kris
This advice is solely coming from the fact that one of these two busy little bees has quietly scored every single fucking week since round 3. The Cows have given up two or more tries to these positions in 5 games this season too, so this result is pretty fuckin likely.
Liam Sutton
The only cunts who love a super early or super late try from a half more than the Cowboys are the Raiders. They’ve been pounced on by 5/8s for the first or last try for the last two games in a row, and the Cows have done it three times already this year. There’s probably better first or last tryscorer options in this game, but I still like him to get in regardless.
Heilum Luki
Oi speaking of late game tries, this cunt fuckin loves it ay. Twice in the last 7 games he has scored the last try in a match, and two more times he has scored near the end, only to have some other cunt barge over a minute later. I know all about the latter because I get on this cunt every week to bring the house down, and you should too. Cunt.
