Isaiah Iongi
It turns out Rugby League players’ behaviour does influence people off-field, which is why I’ll be watching this one while rollin bones in the bathtub. This cunt isn’t just a genius off-field either, and the Bulldogs need to be wary of the fact that they have had six tries put on them in the last 8 games by opposition fullbacks, because Parra have scored through whoever is lined up on their arse for the last three straight matches.
Bronson Xerri/Jethro Rinakama
The reason these cunts are combined here and not on the sheet above is that Parramatta have some of the most disgusting left side CTW defence currently on display in the NRL. They have had 20 total tries heaped on them by left centres and wingers, and each of them have scored on the Eels in 7 of the last 9 games. Last time they met, it was the Dogs left winger who got the party started, with Bronson dropping the mic at the tail end of the game. I think a repeat of the latter is more likely there punters, because left centres have put the full stop on them in the weeks since, and Xerri has run the last try over in the weeks since.
The Fox/Brian Kelly
The Dogs have been scored on every single week by an opposition winger. In 7 of those games, wingers combined for 2 or more tries against them. There have also been 6 times when the left winger (which in this case would be the Fox) has scored the first or last try. Josh and Brian have each scored the first try once.
Bailey Hayward
The Bulldogs hooker is still yet to score a try in 2026, but he will never get a better opportunity than this week against a team who has been scored on by dummy-halves for the last three fuckin straight weeks. He wants one. Let’s hope this is the week he gets one.
Joash Papalii/Lachlan Galvin
Both of these teams have given up 5 tries to these two respective positions. Both of these respective positions have scored 5 or more tries. Both of these respective positions scored against each other last time around. Both of these teams still suck against halves… respectively.
Dylan Walker
I have nothing to back this up, I just fuckin hate this cunt so the way this week has been going for my punting, why wouldn’t it end with him crossing the stripe just to fuck off me in particular?