Kaeo Weekes Mate, I gotta tell ya, I am really starting to fuckin love the Newcastle Knights. They play good footy, score a truckload of tries on any given week, and they are consistently shit against the positions they are shit against and by god they stick to it. That makes my job here generally…

Jamayne Isaako The Broncos have had their shit ripped apart by right wingers for 6 tries in their last 4 games and have given up the first try to them more times than any other position at a total of 5 so far. The Fins right wing has scored the most tries for them so…

Haumole Olakau’atu You saw what he did to ‘em a few weeks ago yeah? No team in the league has been destroyed so thoroughly by right edge runners more than the Melbourne Storm. Pack it up, we’re done here. STB  Manly have given up at least 10 more tries to right wingers than any other…

Billy Smith I’m sure Billy Smith is a fine winger and all, but it wouldn’t fuckin matter regardless of who he is, because these cunts fuckin stink very specifically against left wingers, and I mean STINK. I’m not even gonna waste time tryina be funny here Punters, here’s the damage caused by left wingers on…

Jaxen Edgar With Dylbo still getting used to the new orifice in the back of his head, The Panthers jr fullback gets to have another crack at the #1 jersey that he will inevitably inhabit once Edwards gets shipped off to the Tigers or Dragons or wherever Penrith send their busted players to by that…

Heilum Luki Even if the Titans hadn’t been knocked off for 4 tries in their last 6 games to opposition right edge runners, nobody in the world loves anything as much as this cunt loves bookending a game with a meat pie. 7 Fuckin times this year this bloke has scored the first or last…