Brian To’o – Tom Jenkins Righto Punters, these two rascals have scored 14 tries in the last 6 Panthers games. That fact alone would usually be enough to recommend either one of them to double up this week, but it just so happens the Groncos have had 15 fuckin tries put through them by opposition…

Arama Hau Man for all the shit I have heaped on other teams this week, the Melbourne Storm have some of the most fucking diabolical edge defence in the entire comp. Right edge runners alone have completely fucking torched the Storm for 13 tries so far, scoring the first or last try on them 5…

Lehi Hopoate  We all like to have a laugh here, Punters, it’s good for the soul. This week’s laugh comes at the expense of Braidon Burns. Here’s one for ya; Whadda ya get when you cross Braidon Burns with an opposition left winger…? 17 fuckin tries!!!… Knock knock! *Who’s there?* Nine! *Nine who?* Nine fuckin…

Campbell Graham Greg Marzhew may have scored 15 tries or whatever for Newy this season, but his tries against are rapidly approaching that same figure. All but 3 right wingers that have faced the knights in the last 11 rounds have crossed the chalk and they’ve also scored the first opposition try on three occasions,…

Isaiah Iongi I have a pretty strong feeling that the Roosters are about to go on a fairly fucking destructive run to the finals, but in the wake of origin period with a few gaps in their lineup, the Eels should absolutely give em a solid helping of shit this week before they tighten up…

Seb Kris Few things on earth are more disgusting than the Bulldogs defence against left wingers. I mean fuck, this is bad, and they need to be ashamed of this. They have been fucking destroyed for 18 tries and 8 first tries on the season, and fucking 9 tries in the last six games. There’s…

Teig Wilton Steiglitz may have only scored once in the last six Sharks games, but the Dolphins have been pulled apart like a delicious cob loaf by edge runners in recent weeks. These crusty motherfuckers have given up the first try to an opposition second rower for the last three fucking weeks in a row,…

Jahream Bula Bula has only scored 6 tries so far this year, which isn’t any kind of indication that he will score against the Warriors. What is an indication however, is the hilarious stat that the presence of Charnze Nicoll-Klokstad in the Wah’s outside backs appears to line up damn near perfectly with them getting…

No time for writeups of this one Punters, but I assure you the reasoning is sound. Get them stacks, Champions. Make me proud.

Joey Walsh With the utmost respect to recently injured veteran Luke Brooks, It’s finally fkn Joey Walsh time baby! What a week it is to step into the 5/8th position at Manly too, because let me tell ya, these cunts have been poleaxed by left side halves more than any other position over the last…